Hindsight, they say, gives a rare insight and it is on this strength that I set the ball rolling!
As a single child, growing up in the conventional settings of the late sixties and seventies, it didn’t take long before friends replaced pacifiers in my life.
Single children were a rarity those days and most of my friends were blessed with a natural set of play mates – Siblings! This meant that I was more dependant on them than they would ever be on me and, ever since, I have been a witness to the many face(t)s of friendship!
Let me begin with my ‘little’ friends (from those far- off days) who dominated me because I was desperate for their company to play silly games such as ‘London Bridge’ or ‘Hide-and-Seek’! Despite my size let me say that I know how the Lilliputs must have felt when they had to deal with Gulliver!
Years rolled on, friends came and went....
In the meantime there were many who used my services as an Agony Aunt, when I had to spend hours listening to unabated whining. Needless to say these ‘friends’ would simply vanish on the first sign of so much as a whimper from me!
Soon there came a time when my utility as a ‘soft toy’ was put to good use-- when I was required to hold hands, lend a shoulder or make soothing noises, according to the need of the hour, and frantically hope that it works!
How can I forget my ‘special’ friends who loved to update me on issues such as girlfriend number 34 from half way across the globe? I must say their calls were more frequent, and also lasted longer, whenever the ‘flavor of the season’ lost its fragrance.
Then there were those pals who ensured that I have been supplied with all the details of the magnificent, awe- inspiring lives that they have been lucky to lead! Special mention must be made of those who personally hand- picked me to reveal the juicy details of their mind-blowing escapades.
A big ‘thank you’ to all of them! What would have been my life without such ‘mouth -watering’ disclosures?!
There were friends who treated me well until the day I ‘invaded’ their comfort zone. There were others who feigned friendship only to use it as an excuse to enter the ‘no trespassing’ areas -- it did not take them long to fiddle with the ‘privacy settings,’ make off –the- cuff remarks and divulge my personal details to anyone who cared to hear!
With some friends I’ve entered a ‘you-scratch-my-back-and –I’ll –scratch-yours’ pact. It can be tiring at times, but it does work!
Some well -connected friends participate half -heartedly in this glorious game of friendship, possibly because they are anxious that a whole- hearted involvement might prompt me to seek favors!!!..
I say folks, don’t we pass this way but once?
I’m eternally grateful to the ‘I’ll be there for you’ category –the best type of FRIENDS -- -just that I wish I knew where ‘there’ is!!
It is not that I am an updated version of Damon or Pythias. Even as I write this I don’t stand in judgment of anyone, for each one of my friends has helped to fill- in emotional black holes and are the roses in my garden of friendship!
I say roses because friends sustain the beauty of life. Nevertheless roses are special in that they come with thorns. Unless one is careful, one is left to bleed!
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Did You Say Jesus Was Gay?
There is nothing that prevents a musician from musing, but when he belches out banalities at regular intervals it is time for him to stop at what he does best and leave the thinking to rational minds.
When Elton John recently expressed his conviction that Jesus Christ was a super intelligent, compassionate gay individual he surely didn’t mean to demean —being an ‘open’ gay himself. But I would say that his choice of method to remain in the limelight is in bad taste.
It amuses me to think that Sir John has cleverly conjoined traits such as intelligence and compassion with homosexuality, thereby making a veiled attempt at praising himself and the members of his jolly gay bandwagon!
It was not too long ago that Dan Brown , in an effort to debunk the myth surrounding Christ, projected Him as a married person in the ‘Da Vinci Code’ and even went on to describe His present- day descendants!!
I confess to wondering at the plight of Sir John had he dared to pass ‘out-of-the-box’ comments on a certain bearded, long-robed members of the human species .
He would only have to stop speaking, for a ‘fatwa’ to be issued against him, and the world would have witnessed the music maestro hopping between continents, crawling between caves (with his gigolo in tow) in a desperate attempt to stay alive!
Or he would have had to seek refuge in an obscure nation, like MF Hussein, whose artistic expressions (founded on Hindu Goddesses) made the saffron brigade see red!
It is overwhelming to realize that Jesus Christ continues to command attention even after 20 centuries, but He certainly does not need distorted versions of His short existence to promote His causes! Remember, He is already famous and continues to overshadow all those who came before and after Him!
Why is it that these blasphemers, posing as thinkers, fail to realize that there is a middle ground between homosexuality and leading a married life?
We’ve all heard of people who have breathed and lived for a cause. As far as I understand, JC was a revolutionary, and a teacher, who came to challenge and change a populace that was steeped in bigotry and injustice! Given the time and place that He was around, it certainly was no mean task!
He knew His time was short (33 yrs) and was, therefore, focused on completing His mission, the result of which is evident even today!
To commit a slur against the icon of the (still) most popular religion of the world (which does not endorse homosexuality), and to continue to remain alive, speaks volumes about the concepts of compassion and forgiveness that the Great Master has passed on to His followers.
BTW, Sir Elton, you really suck (pun intended)!!
When Elton John recently expressed his conviction that Jesus Christ was a super intelligent, compassionate gay individual he surely didn’t mean to demean —being an ‘open’ gay himself. But I would say that his choice of method to remain in the limelight is in bad taste.
It amuses me to think that Sir John has cleverly conjoined traits such as intelligence and compassion with homosexuality, thereby making a veiled attempt at praising himself and the members of his jolly gay bandwagon!
It was not too long ago that Dan Brown , in an effort to debunk the myth surrounding Christ, projected Him as a married person in the ‘Da Vinci Code’ and even went on to describe His present- day descendants!!
I confess to wondering at the plight of Sir John had he dared to pass ‘out-of-the-box’ comments on a certain bearded, long-robed members of the human species .
He would only have to stop speaking, for a ‘fatwa’ to be issued against him, and the world would have witnessed the music maestro hopping between continents, crawling between caves (with his gigolo in tow) in a desperate attempt to stay alive!
Or he would have had to seek refuge in an obscure nation, like MF Hussein, whose artistic expressions (founded on Hindu Goddesses) made the saffron brigade see red!
It is overwhelming to realize that Jesus Christ continues to command attention even after 20 centuries, but He certainly does not need distorted versions of His short existence to promote His causes! Remember, He is already famous and continues to overshadow all those who came before and after Him!
Why is it that these blasphemers, posing as thinkers, fail to realize that there is a middle ground between homosexuality and leading a married life?
We’ve all heard of people who have breathed and lived for a cause. As far as I understand, JC was a revolutionary, and a teacher, who came to challenge and change a populace that was steeped in bigotry and injustice! Given the time and place that He was around, it certainly was no mean task!
He knew His time was short (33 yrs) and was, therefore, focused on completing His mission, the result of which is evident even today!
To commit a slur against the icon of the (still) most popular religion of the world (which does not endorse homosexuality), and to continue to remain alive, speaks volumes about the concepts of compassion and forgiveness that the Great Master has passed on to His followers.
BTW, Sir Elton, you really suck (pun intended)!!
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Mother…..or Father’s Other?
Recently, a photograph of American Brad Fister kissing his 23-day old baby daughter, born in Hyderabad to a surrogate mother, caught my attention. It was a picture meant to warm the cockles of every heart worth its beat!
But there was a blot on this perfect picture. The baby’s mom was missing! Delving into details revealed the dynamics of a modern day ( but –very- gay) couple, in a stable relationship.
Brad Fister and his gay partner Michael wanted a baby. Fister would donate the sperm but they also needed a female’s egg . They decided to go for egg donation and surrogacy – and the baby was finally born.
The story of gamete donation and surrogacy is all too familiar to many. But in Fister’s case, the concept of motherhood is shrunk into a single cell immersed in a canister of liquid nitrogen!
Being gay is fine….if u have to be! I am not for, or against, same- sex couples. However, it is bewildering to know that there now exist sizeable numbers of what was once considered a “fringe group”. They seem to be peeping out of every cupboard and crevice, with their burgeoning demands and requirements.
Yes, they were marginalized (for reasons little understood) but I don’t understand the hiss, fuss and rant associated with them. For example, there are writers and gay writers, singers and gay singers and every other day someone is going public with his ‘true sexual identity’!!
Recently I read an article by a ‘gay writer and poet’ who froths at the mouth at anything he sees as a slight on gays. This writer was waxing galore on the 12 dalliances that he was concurrently engaged in and about the possible 12 more in the waiting! Even as I salivate at the columnist’s enviable existence, I hate the pomposity with which he throws his audacious coquetry at the general public.
Give us a break, dudes, get on with your lives and don’t try to bulldoze us with your ‘sex-life and sensibilities’.
Sorry for meandering away……
Coming back to Brad and Michael …their daughter has a dad, alright, but what about a mother? This child, who would probably be breast- fed till her surrogate’s contract expires, has been deliberately denied a mother for all her life.
The same parental denial would apply to kids of lesbian couples who would have to live their life without a father .
Now you can drown me with your arguments….yes I know there is a lot of imperfection in many heterosexual families but do we really need to add to the existing mayhem within the diaspora of family prototypes?
Everyone talks of rights –the gay lobby has been one of the most perseverant the world over ! But what about the rights of the unborn and the just- born?
Don’t they deserve a mother ( I mean a regular mother) or is it just a life with the “father’s other???”
But there was a blot on this perfect picture. The baby’s mom was missing! Delving into details revealed the dynamics of a modern day ( but –very- gay) couple, in a stable relationship.
Brad Fister and his gay partner Michael wanted a baby. Fister would donate the sperm but they also needed a female’s egg . They decided to go for egg donation and surrogacy – and the baby was finally born.
The story of gamete donation and surrogacy is all too familiar to many. But in Fister’s case, the concept of motherhood is shrunk into a single cell immersed in a canister of liquid nitrogen!
Being gay is fine….if u have to be! I am not for, or against, same- sex couples. However, it is bewildering to know that there now exist sizeable numbers of what was once considered a “fringe group”. They seem to be peeping out of every cupboard and crevice, with their burgeoning demands and requirements.
Yes, they were marginalized (for reasons little understood) but I don’t understand the hiss, fuss and rant associated with them. For example, there are writers and gay writers, singers and gay singers and every other day someone is going public with his ‘true sexual identity’!!
Recently I read an article by a ‘gay writer and poet’ who froths at the mouth at anything he sees as a slight on gays. This writer was waxing galore on the 12 dalliances that he was concurrently engaged in and about the possible 12 more in the waiting! Even as I salivate at the columnist’s enviable existence, I hate the pomposity with which he throws his audacious coquetry at the general public.
Give us a break, dudes, get on with your lives and don’t try to bulldoze us with your ‘sex-life and sensibilities’.
Sorry for meandering away……
Coming back to Brad and Michael …their daughter has a dad, alright, but what about a mother? This child, who would probably be breast- fed till her surrogate’s contract expires, has been deliberately denied a mother for all her life.
The same parental denial would apply to kids of lesbian couples who would have to live their life without a father .
Now you can drown me with your arguments….yes I know there is a lot of imperfection in many heterosexual families but do we really need to add to the existing mayhem within the diaspora of family prototypes?
Everyone talks of rights –the gay lobby has been one of the most perseverant the world over ! But what about the rights of the unborn and the just- born?
Don’t they deserve a mother ( I mean a regular mother) or is it just a life with the “father’s other???”
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Apartheid On Valentine’s Day
Today is Valentine’s Day!
It is that time of the year when the world witnesses apartheid of a different sort-- when people get divided into ‘the loved’ and ‘the not-so-loved’!
We all love to be loved! But the rush for the V-Day trappings, often fueled by compulsion, sets me wondering as to what the fuss is all about and why there is this scramble for cards, roses and gifts to please a potential partner, on a particular day!
It would sound boring and clichéd if I say that those who truly love do not wait for the V-day to go for the ‘kill’. Again, it is not my business to talk about those who need a Valentine’s Day to remind them of that special someone.
This day, my heart goes out to those unloved souls, the world over and, to those who found love only to forgo it.
It is all very well to celebrate love but do people have to be gluttonous about it? Is it right to indulge in such brazen display in the name of love?
Do the frenzied couples even fleetingly think that there could be millions out there whose lives could be transformed by a single gesture of love?
Don’t get me wrong! I don’t hero worship Muthalik, neither do I belong to the Ram Sena. But a look at the statistics show that the holiday season records the maximum numbers of depression cases and suicides the world over. It is winter, no doubt, when SAD sufferers go through their worst episodes, but it is also a time for family bonding, for loving and for being loved--- a time when loners get truly hit.
One can understand teenage revelry on V-day! But as adults it would be more responsible, and even nice, if people could be subtler and did their bit to make others feel less lonely. Of course this is just a thought-- –no apologies tendered!
Love, they say, keeps the world going…..Never stop loving, instead, on this Valentine’s Day make a pact to love differently . Let each of us include one more person in our circle of love so that there is enough love in the air to keep the world going round !
It is that time of the year when the world witnesses apartheid of a different sort-- when people get divided into ‘the loved’ and ‘the not-so-loved’!
We all love to be loved! But the rush for the V-Day trappings, often fueled by compulsion, sets me wondering as to what the fuss is all about and why there is this scramble for cards, roses and gifts to please a potential partner, on a particular day!
It would sound boring and clichéd if I say that those who truly love do not wait for the V-day to go for the ‘kill’. Again, it is not my business to talk about those who need a Valentine’s Day to remind them of that special someone.
This day, my heart goes out to those unloved souls, the world over and, to those who found love only to forgo it.
It is all very well to celebrate love but do people have to be gluttonous about it? Is it right to indulge in such brazen display in the name of love?
Do the frenzied couples even fleetingly think that there could be millions out there whose lives could be transformed by a single gesture of love?
Don’t get me wrong! I don’t hero worship Muthalik, neither do I belong to the Ram Sena. But a look at the statistics show that the holiday season records the maximum numbers of depression cases and suicides the world over. It is winter, no doubt, when SAD sufferers go through their worst episodes, but it is also a time for family bonding, for loving and for being loved--- a time when loners get truly hit.
One can understand teenage revelry on V-day! But as adults it would be more responsible, and even nice, if people could be subtler and did their bit to make others feel less lonely. Of course this is just a thought-- –no apologies tendered!
Love, they say, keeps the world going…..Never stop loving, instead, on this Valentine’s Day make a pact to love differently . Let each of us include one more person in our circle of love so that there is enough love in the air to keep the world going round !
Sunday, December 6, 2009
War of the Pseudo Drs
There was a report in the papers about an ongoing war between the physio ‘doctors’, the medical ‘doctors’ and the government.
Apparently the physiotherapists have been riding high on the prefix ‘Dr’ and it mattered not in the least to them if the rest of the world accepted it or not.
This, of course has peeved the medical ‘doctors’-- the supreme sovereign in the realm of health.
The government backs the latter with the contention that the physios’ claim to the prefix would confuse the public as to who the real doctors are!!
But I say, hold your horses people,…… and take a minute to observe the pathos. Would it be a trifle too much if I point out that the ‘real’ doctors have been taken out of the equation?
In those ancient days the word ‘doctor’ was a reference to a very learned person who was held in high esteem for his knowledge. So we deduce that a man who burned a lot of midnight oil striving to understand, evaluate and analyse, in order to gain knowledge, was the original assignee for the word ‘doctor’.
The present day claimants ---such as the medical, ayurvedic, homeo, aroma, physio, energy, pranic ( have I left out any?)--- have plenty to prove before using the word !!
Some spend 4 and a half to 5 years, after school, to learn a trade and stake a claim on the prefix ‘dr’!! Some unabashedly claim after a mere 2-6 months diploma !
Common sense demands that the term doctor be best left to those ‘silent sufferers’ –the original doctors –the ones with a doctorate. What say you, folks? Simple logic, isn’t it?
The rest may best be referred by their trade name – physicians, medical practitioners or medical consultants or more specifically cardiologists, urologists, neonatologists ……and the rest as dentists, pathologists, physiotherapists, aroma therapists, ayur physicians, pranic or energy healers and so on and on…
One can never forget the way in which the simple white lab coat, that once signified perseverance and hardwork, has been reduced to a symbol of false prestige and inflated pride to be flaunted by all and sundry . Today the fact that the driver, the cook and the bakery man wears a white coat has helped to demystify it… a bit!
Please leave the prefix ‘Dr’ to the ones to whom it originally belongs . (Here I do not include the honorary types, heavily favored by favoritism, or, the ones who have acquired a degree through questionable means).
Otherwise we will have the charlatans and the quacks misusing the word and disrobing its glory.
Now we do not want that ….do we?
Apparently the physiotherapists have been riding high on the prefix ‘Dr’ and it mattered not in the least to them if the rest of the world accepted it or not.
This, of course has peeved the medical ‘doctors’-- the supreme sovereign in the realm of health.
The government backs the latter with the contention that the physios’ claim to the prefix would confuse the public as to who the real doctors are!!
But I say, hold your horses people,…… and take a minute to observe the pathos. Would it be a trifle too much if I point out that the ‘real’ doctors have been taken out of the equation?
In those ancient days the word ‘doctor’ was a reference to a very learned person who was held in high esteem for his knowledge. So we deduce that a man who burned a lot of midnight oil striving to understand, evaluate and analyse, in order to gain knowledge, was the original assignee for the word ‘doctor’.
The present day claimants ---such as the medical, ayurvedic, homeo, aroma, physio, energy, pranic ( have I left out any?)--- have plenty to prove before using the word !!
Some spend 4 and a half to 5 years, after school, to learn a trade and stake a claim on the prefix ‘dr’!! Some unabashedly claim after a mere 2-6 months diploma !
Common sense demands that the term doctor be best left to those ‘silent sufferers’ –the original doctors –the ones with a doctorate. What say you, folks? Simple logic, isn’t it?
The rest may best be referred by their trade name – physicians, medical practitioners or medical consultants or more specifically cardiologists, urologists, neonatologists ……and the rest as dentists, pathologists, physiotherapists, aroma therapists, ayur physicians, pranic or energy healers and so on and on…
One can never forget the way in which the simple white lab coat, that once signified perseverance and hardwork, has been reduced to a symbol of false prestige and inflated pride to be flaunted by all and sundry . Today the fact that the driver, the cook and the bakery man wears a white coat has helped to demystify it… a bit!
Please leave the prefix ‘Dr’ to the ones to whom it originally belongs . (Here I do not include the honorary types, heavily favored by favoritism, or, the ones who have acquired a degree through questionable means).
Otherwise we will have the charlatans and the quacks misusing the word and disrobing its glory.
Now we do not want that ….do we?
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
LOST WISH
Yet another birthday scurried past,
I was in no hurry -- time was!
Your muteness i had learned to accept,
I could've stayed younger-- had you called!
I was in no hurry -- time was!
Your muteness i had learned to accept,
I could've stayed younger-- had you called!
Thursday, October 8, 2009
MAYA
The best thing about writing blogs merely for pleasure, is that it does not promote forced writing.
Having abstained from my pet past time for a while, I felt the itch to blog again which is when I thought about something a friend once mentioned -- that what we experience in this life, or, what we perceive to be our experiences in this life, including the emotions that wade through us, is ‘ Maya’ !
I was informed that life is transient ( I have heard this before) and that life events are mere illusions (how I wish!!).
Maya, I believe, is for those few among us who have ‘evolved’ beyond the ordinary after a lifetime pursuit of unworldliness! To an ordinary mortal like me, this our pulsating existence is very real.
Let me explain with a parallel. Man evolved from apes but it would be foolish to say that the various facets of the apes’ life is illusionary merely because the comparatively less- evolved creatures failed to reach their full potential.
Our existence today is linked to the time when life first stirred on earth. We remain baffled by the ‘African Eve’; we respectfully acknowledge and study the lives of our caveman ancestors whose saga is not illusionary, but continues to illuminate our lives, millions of years later, albeit in a remote way.They were the super heroes( the original kind -without sound effects), who honed their instincts to leave an indelible impression on the human brain, who instilled in mankind the everlasting truth that brain power is superior to muscle power and that survival is the ultimate goal.
Every life, with its wealth of experience, is a page that will go down in the collective history of the universe. Each tombstone speaks a story with a moral for those who would care to listen; it does not represent an illusion- but is a symbol of grounded reality !
Belief in Maya prompted the mystics to probe life. The concept of Maya provides solace to escapists - to a logical mind the dynamics of this life are achingly real!
Having abstained from my pet past time for a while, I felt the itch to blog again which is when I thought about something a friend once mentioned -- that what we experience in this life, or, what we perceive to be our experiences in this life, including the emotions that wade through us, is ‘ Maya’ !
I was informed that life is transient ( I have heard this before) and that life events are mere illusions (how I wish!!).
Maya, I believe, is for those few among us who have ‘evolved’ beyond the ordinary after a lifetime pursuit of unworldliness! To an ordinary mortal like me, this our pulsating existence is very real.
Let me explain with a parallel. Man evolved from apes but it would be foolish to say that the various facets of the apes’ life is illusionary merely because the comparatively less- evolved creatures failed to reach their full potential.
Our existence today is linked to the time when life first stirred on earth. We remain baffled by the ‘African Eve’; we respectfully acknowledge and study the lives of our caveman ancestors whose saga is not illusionary, but continues to illuminate our lives, millions of years later, albeit in a remote way.They were the super heroes( the original kind -without sound effects), who honed their instincts to leave an indelible impression on the human brain, who instilled in mankind the everlasting truth that brain power is superior to muscle power and that survival is the ultimate goal.
Every life, with its wealth of experience, is a page that will go down in the collective history of the universe. Each tombstone speaks a story with a moral for those who would care to listen; it does not represent an illusion- but is a symbol of grounded reality !
Belief in Maya prompted the mystics to probe life. The concept of Maya provides solace to escapists - to a logical mind the dynamics of this life are achingly real!
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